Maybe smurf is right, that i’m a coward guy who tried to manipulate young girls that wrote a stupid letter instead of calling her family. Maybe i should have faced her family before I left, and maybe im just bullshitting my way out of a responsibilty that i should be facing.

Or maybe SMURF IS WRONG…coz…

I really love that girl, the fact that she’s 10 years younger than me that’s why i tried to call her everyday to talked w/ her parents but the thing is she’s just dropping my calls off…

I wanna meet her family when i was still stayin’ in Manila but she don’t want me too. You wanna know why? Coz she loved me so much and don’t want me to experience the hell that you went through. Since I love her so much, then her wish is always my command…

Does it mean that by trying to take care of my children, providing them their needs, giving them what they want and standing as both father/mother for them a form of bullshitting my way out of responsibilty???

And of course, SMURF IS DAMNED RIGHT that i should have written an apology letter for the mom of my other children, leaving us for another man. So, how am i suppose to start the letter??  Somethin’ like this one? “I’m very sorry ‘coz you’ve deserted us…” or this one? “I’m very sorry that you left our children to be with another man…”

And Lastly, Smurf is right again… I’m an asshole… who tried to love Ayah and planned to marry her… I’m an asshole who is really planning about my future w/ Ayah… I’m an asshole that wants Ayah to be always happy…

OR MAYBE SMURF JUST HAVEN’T HEARD THE OTHER SIDE OF THE STORY…