I was so immersed in my own ‘little world’ that my aunt once thought that I had lost my sanity since I was frequently talking to my self while her son, my cousin a year older than me, was all quite playing with his GameBoy (the original model). Years later we would grow up and go to school together, to our family, and my aunt’s amazement, I, who spent my childhood days playing with plastic and wooden blocks and talking to my self in a corner did better and excelled over my cousin who spent his growing up years honing his cut-throat skill of button mashing and a mastery of the GameBoy and other electronic devices like the VHS player and the SEGA console. Don’t forget though that I was the weird one.

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Living here in Istanbul for a year now, I can say, I am settled in. I don’t get lost anymore in the streets. I don’t get ripped off by cab drivers. I know which grocery sells the cheapest detergent. More importantly, I’ve established quite a circle of friends…

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My sister B and I married on the same year, 1985. Another sister , M got hitched in 1986 and another sister, L in 1987. And guess what? We all encountered marital problems like most marriages. But how would I know it back then?

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hmmm… emotions are really bugging my life right now…

ANGER & LOVE

two opposing forces but can never be separated in this such imperfect world…

well, so far… hmm!

Is this what you call LOVE YOUR ENEMY?
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Gone where the days….

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…I had spent half of my life as a highly social creature, meeting all kinds of people in all types of places. I was like Kevin Bacon, connected to almost anybody within six degrees of separation. I had a bounty of dating experiences and relationships which, thankfully, had mostly evolved into healthy friendships. For instance, when I moved from North Hollywood to West LA one year, my moving crew consisted of my boyfriend Allen and three exes. When I look back, the situation was truly comical even if I didn’t think so then — while the three in my past were bonding over their memories of my belongings, I would repeatedly hush them up with my deadly stink-eye, hoping that Allen wouldn’t discover their single common denominator.

Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

I have very fond memories of this church. Being only a few blocks from our house, this was where we went to every Sunday. I had my first communion here, as well as my baptism and confirmation. Actually, I was baptized twice on that very same Sunday — the first was at 10 a.m. and the second was just before noon.

And having been baptized twice, I would occasionally tease a devout Catholic aunt, that I was assured a ticket to heaven. But she would quickly argue that had I been truly touched by God while going through those two baptismal rites, I would have been busily pursuing priesthood, or at the very least, had grown up to become an ideal Catholic. You see, something happened when I was about twelve that she did not approve of.

I just had dinner with a former grade school classmate; it’s been decades since we last saw each other. It turns out we have a lot of friends and acquaintances in common — most of them fixtures in the Filipino-American community in Los Angeles (i.e. activists, public servants, politicos, educators, and the like). I mentioned the name of a percussionist I used to see for almost a year. I wasn’t surprised she knew him, but I reeled from what she said next. “He has only 10 percent of his vision left,” she said. “He’s blind.”
Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

I met D when I was not even 16. I was at a really popular mexican bar/restaurant in Makati at the time, hanging out with my college-age boyfriend and his bestfriend G. D was 23, a foreign student studying at the state university. He and his friend descended upon our table to say hello to the guys; they were inebriated and stoned, and they scared the hell out of me.

Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

Whether we admit it or not, the people that we most take for granted are usually the ones who have given to us freely and without measure.

It has weighed on my mind lately because I keep seeing individuals who are in need of help not even ask nicely, but instead expect it – and if they don’t receive it, actually demand it. People have extended their hands to them all their lives that they now think of it as a right, and no longer a privilege. They feel a false sense of entitlement, simply because people who love them have met their needs without them having to ask. They even forget to show appreciation after they get what they want.

Consequently, no matter how much they are loved, that kind of behavior never fails to cause that well of love and generosity start to go dry. There’s no faster “drying agent” than ingratitude.

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I fought over a boy once.

Well, maybe not exactly. But I wouldn’t give up a boy, and almost destroyed a friendship.
Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

Rosanna’s dad loved to tease me, but even more so after he had read my diary. He used to say — repeatedly — my life would be glorious and tragic, like that of Marie Antoinette’s. What, I’d protest loudly, I’d get my head chopped off and have it fall in a bloody descent into an empty basket? He said I was missing the point. It was the way I’d live, not how I died, that would define me.

Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

There’s nothing quite like your first grown-up kind of love. I don’t mean the love you experience as a true adult; I mean the kind you have that makes you feel you’ve grown up, even if you’re really just a kid and have so much more to learn and experience.

I was 15 when I had that kind of love.

Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

Dating Commandment No. 1: Thou shalt not piss off your prom date for she shalt strike back one day.

This is that day.

When I was 13 years old, I fell head over heels in love with a boy named Martin. I can’t explain why, except that maybe he was the first boy who phoned me regularly, with our conversations lasting for hours on end. OK, so maybe he was smart, funny, and a bit charming in an arrogant sort of way, I suppose. And during one of those late-night talks, I promised I was going to invite him to my first prom, in two years. I figured I had scored myself a sure date and didn’t have to worry about it later. Continue reading at Gigi Goes Gaga.

my product of frustration…

visit the dubai chronicles for more…

Sometimes, making peace with some things doesn’t mean you’ve heard the end of it.

Note to self, don’t put yourself in situations where you might give your heart a nasty beating, it’s been through enough. Know when to quit.

[more postscripts]

(musical couple? Hallmark card ito?!)

While scanning TV channels yesterday afternoon, I came across The Buzz, so naturally, I waited for the chismis headlines to be aired. Then they showed this teaser about a new couple — an international singer and a pop contest champ. To give that blind item feel, they blurred the faces of the celebs involved, at ang nasabi ko na lang… AY, HINDI HALATA KUNG SINO SILA. hahaha.

Changing channels from Studio 23 to ABS-CBN (Talo UP, ohcammon. at di ko pa nakikita si Karlos sa TV!), I waited for that feature about the couple. Intrigera tendencies calling. So there, it turned out to be Kris Lawrence and Jasmine Trias (ay hindi halata!). And it was just my uncontrollable intrigera tendencies that got me to watch that segment. Actually, (eto di na sarcastic) I really didn’t know who the guy was, based on the teaser they showed. So ok, it turned out to be Kris Lawrence. And yeah, I still had no idea who he was, until I did some research.

Kris Lawrence is the Search for the Star In A Million Season 2 Grand Champion. He was that guy who sang “When I See You Smile,” one song that I kept hearing over Love Radio during my Pen days at the laundry section & at the Pen Caf. Even then, I already disliked the song. wahahaha. Nakakatulig kasi! Just not my type. Napapagod ka na nga sa pagkayod tapos lintek na ganyan pa ang mapapakinggan mo?! Pero akalain mong talagang ginawan ko pa ito ng entry. Yan ay sa kadahilanang HINDI KO MAWARI ANG KANYANG JAPORMS:

(click here)

where love is made, love is had and love is killed just like that

Totoo nga ang sabi ni Kulas, kahit ganon lang sya, di mo talaga sya maiisahan. Akalain mo na naisip nya na daanin sa withdrawal slip. Tama nga naman, walang …

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BAWAL ANG ADDICT DITO!

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